Ideablanket 's: You're Special Too, Stop Comparing Yourself to Others!

Enjoy your own life without comparing it with that of another. - Marquis de Condorcet

Terkadang kita sering tidak puas dengan apa yang sudah kita miliki atau yang sudah kita capai. Kita selalu ingin lebih, lebih, dan lebih. Selain ingin lebih. Kita juga sering kali tidak puas dengan diri sendiri dan selalu berusaha dan berharap menjadi orang lain, yang menurut kita “lebih” dari kita. Kita membandingkan dengan yang lain, membandingkan apa yang kita punya dan apa yang tidak.

Padahal, apakah dengan membandingkan kelebihan/ apa yang mereka punya dengan kekurangan/ apa yang kita tidak punya, we’d size up or it’d make us feel good? Nope! It’s a sure-fire recipe for a drop in self-confidence and for unhappiness. Lalu bagaimana kalau kita mulai membandingkan dan iri dengan yang lain?

Break that habit and try to be aware of when you start comparing yourself to others … once you’ve developed this awareness, try this trick: stop yourself. Tell yourself, “Stop that!” And then start thinking about all the things you DO have, the things you love, the people you have, the blessings that life has given you. Make this a regular practice, and you’ll start to be happier with your life.

Di bawah ini ada beberapa tips yang berguna saat kita mulai membandingkan dan iri dengan yang lain, semoga bermanfaat :)

Awareness. Kebanyakan dari kita melakukan perbandingan sosial tanpa menyadari kita sedang melakukannya. Itu wajar saya kira. So the solution is to become conscious — bring these thoughts to the forefront of your consciousness by being on the lookout for them. If you focus on these thoughts for a few days, it gets much easier with practice, and soon it’ll be hard not to notice.
Stop yourself. Jika kamu sudah sadar sedang melakukan perbandingan ini, give yourself a pause. Don’t berate yourself or feel bad — just acknowledge the thought, and gently change focus.
Count your blessings. A better focus is on what you do have, on what you are already blessed with. Hitung apa yang kamu miliki BUKAN yang tidak! Think about how lucky you are to have what you have, to have the people in your life who care about you, to be alive at all.
Focus on your strengths. Daripada melihat kelemahanmu, lebih baik tanyakan pada dirimu apa kekuatanmu. Celebrate them! Be proud of them. Don’t brag, but feel good about them and work on using them to your best advantage.
Be OK with imperfection. Tak ada yang sempurna di dunia ini, kita semua tahu itu, but emotionally we seem to feel bad when we don’t reach perfection. You aren’t perfect and you never will be. I certainly am not, and I’ve learned to be OK with that. Sure, keep trying to improve, but don’t think you’ll ever be the “perfect person”. If you look at it in a different way, that imperfection is what makes you who you are, you already are perfect.
Don’t knock others down. Kadang kita mencoba mengkritik orang lain untuk membuat kita terlihat atau merasa lebih baik. Membuat seseorang down demi keuntunganmu adalah destruktif. It forms an enemy when you could be forming a friend. In the end, that hurts you as well. Instead, try to support others in their success — that will lead to more success on your part.
Focus on the journey. Don’t focus on how you rank in comparison to others — Hidup bukanlah kompetisi. It’s a journey. We are all on a journey, to find something, to become something, to learn, to create. That journey has nothing to do with how well other people are doing, or what they have. It has everything to do with what we want to do, and where we want to go. That’s all you need to worry about.
Learn to love enough. Jika kamu selalu ingin apa yang orang lain miliki, kamu tidak akan pernah merasa puas. That’s an endless cycle, dan tidak akan membawa kebahagiaan. Tidak peduli berapa banyak baju yang kamu beli, tidak peduli berapa banyak rumah yang kamu miliki, tidak peduli berapa banyak mobil mewah yang kamu dapat… Kamu tidak akan pernah merasa cukup. Sebaiknya belajarlah untuk menyadari bahwa apa yang kamu miliki itu sudah cukup. If you have shelter over your head, food on the table, clothes on your back, and people who love you, you are blessed. You have enough. Anything you have over and above that is more than enough. Be good with that, and you’ll find contentment.